Posts

X

Image
ThaMonthly 2.24.23 X Tha Black & Tha Beautiful ___ By Chrys D. ‘Say It Loud… … I’m BLACK & I’m proud.” Consider this scenario. Being a working, bill & tax-paying Black Woman in 2023 America. Now apply that to the health care system. A system that sees 41.4% of Black maternal deaths per 100,000 live births. Differences in health insurance coverage & access. Being turned down by doctors when requesting urgent medical care.  Can’t imagine that?? Let me drop a few names. Kira Dixon Johnson Hemorrhage Kelly Ervin Toxemia Poisoning Shamony Makeba Gibson Pulmonary Embolism Amber Rose Issac Emergency C-Section All beautiful Black Women who are no longer here due to having their pain minimized or ignored. Reported mistreatment met with ZERO assistance from doctors & nurses alike. I’ve unfortunately experienced my fair share of this type of treatment. Had an Emergency Room doctor tell me once that he felt my pain was

IX

Image
ThaMonthly 1.29.23 IX Tha Ovulation Station ___ By Chrys D. “Smoking on a backwood cause I miss my ex… …now I’m ovulating & I need rough sex. So for starters just to be transparent? I never have, never desired to, nor never will know when I’m ovulating. Reason being is because once I realized conceiving a child wasn’t really possible, I could give a FUCK about ovulation. Quite frankly, I’m well overdue for a doctor to snatch all of this bootleg equipment we so affectionately call ‘lady parts,’ LMAO. This is also NOT me saying I’ve never felt it happening, or sensed it coming. You kinda can’t help it when you have a natural intuition with your body. Being plagued with PCOS & her best friend endometriosis, I’ve experienced wild levels of ovulation. Literally as quaint & beautiful like butterflies flowing freely in my pelvis. Or as unfathomably excruciating as hot daggers bludgeoning my uterus! Couple this with an appetite that gluttony would drop a jaw to & an intense sex

VIII

Image
  ThaMonthly   1.9.23 VIII Sex & Tha Period ___ By Chrys D. “All I Wanna do is Zooma Zoom Zoom Zoom…” … ina Poom Poom. In my personal unpopular opinion, sex is STRICTLY PROHIBITED while I’m on my cycle! The pain that already comes with my PCOS/Endo would never allow it. And as clingy as I am with my gorgeous girlfriend, sometimes I don’t even want to be touched! However, very common in the sexual diaspora, receiving your ‘red wings’ or ‘parting the red sea’ is most definitely a thing! Even beyond the potential ‘sexual’ association, we all want a partner (male or female) to morally support us in that inevitable time of the month. And sometimes, that means doing the ‘No Pants Dance!’ It has been said that sex during menstruation has certain benefits. Among these are: An increased arousal Strengthened connection with your partner Relief from cramps Possible shorter periods To be transparent (& maybe a little TMI), I have experienced lessened cramps from self-gratification in the l

VII

Image
  ThaMonthly   12.14.22 VII Tha Period & Tha Partner ___ By Chrys D. ‘Loving you whether…” …times are good or bad, happy or sad. As women (& honestly just as humans), we all desire someone who WANTS to deal with us. Someone who doesn’t mind ‘bringing up the rear’ or ‘taking up the slack’ when something goes awry. You know, the whole ‘sickness & in health’ bit. But Chile sometimes sadly that’s just NOT the case. In all fairness, everyone wasn’t created the exact same. Some of us are natural born providers. Some of us are worker bees who refuse to make ourselves available for emotional attachment. But some of us are natural nurturers. Or maybe just strongly possess the ‘kind’ gene, & to have that is truly a blessing. I’ve fortunately & unfortunately been on both sides of this spectrum. In my last relationship, I was neglected in every way possible. I experienced many lonely & terrifying ER visits. And sadly, on one of the most important days of my life (my fibroid

VI

Image
  ThaMonthly   10.22.22 VI But, Do I Matter Tho? ___ By Chrys D.  ‘Life is like a box of chocolates…’ … you never know what you’re gonna get.  There is no fucking reason a woman should feel her job (or anything for that matter) will be jeopardized due to her reproductive condition! No way!! As women we already have to endure so much. For the demographic of women that currently (or luckily never) have had this issue, I commend you! To the other women (like myself) who periodically are subjected to this, I’m so incredibly sorry.  My last job tried to terminate me because leaving work to go to the hospital for a ruptured cyst was a “6th absence”. So they suspended me until they had a ‘verdict’ on if they would fire me in the next 4 days.  I resigned.  The last few weeks have been very reflective. I’ve truly been allowing myself grace to know my full worth & that I MATTER. That I don’t have to stay anywhere I’m not valued. I’m learning that my past does not have to infiltrate my future

V

Image
  ThaMonthly  9.26.22 V Don’t Deal, Heal. ___ By Chrys D.  ‘Sometimes you feel like a nut!’ …sometimes, you don’t. For the female species, most times the manner in which we heal is not always absolute. Our healing process always has to be amended--or squandered in some way, shape or form. Allotted time for work, school, family etc is always mandatory. But when it comes to self care, we truly neglect ourselves. So just imagine: all of your normal, daily hustle & bustle. Then add a reproductive issue, menopause, or pregnancy to that mix. Overwhelming, huh? Whether you use crystals, meditate & pray, consume herbs, or take a nice long bath/shower, healing is so essential! Years & years I limited myself to just a hot bath complete with a heating pad session immediately after. I learned that the older I became, the less this worked for me. By the age of 25, my ovarian cysts at the time controlled my whole life. Pain so severe the hottest water or heat coils couldn’t aid it! Many

IV

Image
ThaMonthly 8.12.22. IV The Period & The Paycheck ___ By Chrys D. ‘Make that money’ …don’t let that money make you. Ok Gang so look. This blog post & the language that accompanies it will be a tad bit rougher than normal, so buckle up :) As I’m sure with a zillion other women around the world, the menstrual cycle is unkind to us. In some cases, our employers are just as unkind. My definition of ‘unkind’ being ‘misogynistic, pompous assholes.’ Every job I’ve held with the exception of 1.5 (.5 being my current employer LMAO) has given much backlash when it came to my reproductive health. Never been terminated; however, suspended or received little to no hours for scheduled workdays. Or even make up for time missed. Being suspended from my current employer due to my Endo in February sparked the brainchild for ThaMonthly. Flare ups with my condition became extremely severe in 2021. The majority of that year was spent in the ER every month. I started with my current company in Septem